Romans! Madrigals! The Dark Ages! Revolutions! Trumpets! The Oranges of The First World War! All of this (except trumpets) and more, is covered in this definitive, easy-clean history of all world history so far, written by the 21st Century’s leading historian, philosopher and thinkerer Philomena Cunk.

Focusing on the inventions, art, and brainboxes that made the modern world the unbearable place it is today, The World According to Cunk is the history book to end all history books: more unputdownable than Andrew Marr’s History Of The World, less unpickupable than Yuval Noah Harari’s Sapiens, and noticeably less in ancient Greek than Herodotus’ Histories.

Philomena Cunk says: “About the world, written on the world, and available at all the world’s remaining bookshops, The World According to Cunk is the definitive history of the world. There will never need be another history book. Unless something major happens. Even then they’ll probably just put something up on TikTok about it. A word of warning: please don’t buy it if you’re expecting anything about trumpets in it. You will only be disappointed.”